My Makeup Box Subscription Obsession

A few things I’ve been obsessed with lately are makeup subscription boxes! I mean, what’s better than getting a monthly box of makeup goodies? In my opinion, not much! If it were up to me, and not my checkbook, I’d be getting a box a day! But, for now, I get ipsy, which I really love. One of the best things about ipsy, is that they not only send cool samples of makeup products, but they always send a cute makeup bag to go with it. The bags are always different and really cute. Some of which you could totally use for your purse and one I thought would make a cute clutch bag. I also love birchbox, which I have sent to my mom, for a special mommy to daughter treat. Birchbox does have a male version of a box, but I can’t speak to how to great it is, since I’ve never purchased it. Both of these monthly boxes cost $10 per month. each,so overall, it’s not too much of an expense. My favorite is julep. If you see any of my pictures from instagram, you’ll quickly see that there is a tie between cat pictures and nail pictures. Julep is mainly about nail polish, but they also have great makeup selections. What I really love about julep is that they’re cruelty free! This is of course a very important topic for me, since I’m vegan, and an animal rights activist. Julep is a bit more at $20 per month, but they give the option to skip that month’s box and/or provide a choice of a selection from another box. When you sign up, you take a maven style quiz; I happen to be “classic with a twist” which explains my style perfectly. However, if I want to mix it up, I can certainly go into my maven box display and choose another box to be sent to me instead. I’ve yet to have a month where I’ve decided to forego a month. Who are they kidding? But, at $20 per month, I have to make sure that I really want that month’s selection. Typically, they send two nail polishes and a lip gloss or blush or eye shadow. It’s so much fun to receive my monthly box, it’s like Christmas opening them up. I’d love to start receiving the Elf box, but it’s a bit more and only comes out every 8 months, so I’ll pass for now. There are much more options for boxes, and it’s not only limited to makeup, there are nature, food and stationary boxes. Very fun! I’d say you get your money back because the samples are sometimes more than sample size. I’ve received full size item’s that I may not have considered purchasing before getting them in a box. I’ve recently took advantage of a 50% off sale with Elf and got some great deals for only $12. I absolutely love a DEAL! I also got a great deal from the body shop. Both Elf and the Body Shop are cruelty free brands, which is very important to me. Julep also let’s you get your first box for free, find the code on their website, http://www.julep.com/rewardsref/index/refer/id/444525/. You can also join ipsy by going here, http://www.ipsy.com/ladynicole. You can join birchbox by going here, https://www.birchbox.com/invite/r43h6.

 

February Julep Box

February Ipsy Box

One of my favorite Julep Colors

March Ipsy Box

If you check out my instagram pictures, on the right of the blog, you’ll see that I typically provide pictures of all of the bags I receive. It’s fun and fairly inexpensive. Granted, they’re a luxury item and it’s my one vice. I’ve always loved makeup, especially nail polish. I inherited that love from my grandmother, who was a Vanda saleslady. Anyone remember that makeup? She was always decked out, even when she was going to church. I remember when she started to get ready, from her hair, to face to her nails. It was an all afternoon affair, since she attended the Saturday evening mass at St. Augustine Catholic Church. She was a beautiful woman, who loved looking her best. She was and will forever be, one of my favorite role models. Love you Grandma!

So, if you love to pamper yourself and get a monthly gift of fun and unique makeup products, they you may just want to check out getting a box of your own. You can always cancel at any time. I mean, getting makeup next to a bunch of bills, does tend to take the sting out of it! I hope you enjoy your monthly boxes as much as I do! Enjoy my makeup friends!

My Kind of Vacation

A friend of mine is currently on vacation and posting pictures of a lot of the things she’s encountered. I haven’t been on vacation, well, ever. I mean I lived in California and we went to the beach a few times, but a formal vacation? No. My husband and I have never even gone on a honeymoon. I just can’t afford a vacation. Granted, I know there are mini vacations that aren’t far from home or many are taking “staycations”, which is a vacation where you stay at home, but go out and do things together in your town. Truth be told, I don’t like vacation. I hate staying away from my home for any length of time. The idea of not sleeping in my own bed isn’t appealing, at all. Even when I visit my family, I want to come back the same day. Thankfully, we don’t live too far from each other, so driving two hours to get home, isn’t an issue. I don’t ever want to be away from my kitties, except for maybe a few hours, but definitely not for a week. But, I know I’m in the minority. Most people dream about a vacation on the beach and time away from their daily life. But going to the beach sounds like torture for me. I hate the heat and hate being in the sunshine. I’m much more of a Fall person and enjoy cool days and even cooler nights. Perhaps a trip to the NorthEast would be fun in the Fall.

However, a vacation is not in the finances, for a very long time. Nor is it a priority for me. But, I thought about the things at home that I really enjoy and can feel like a “vacation” to me. Perhaps vacation isn’t the right word, but I think it’s important to focus on the things you enjoy while at home, so you can make it part of your routine. For example, I love candles. I always have a candle burning. There’s something soothing about it and calming. I don’t buy expensive candles, but love a bargain. When Target clearanced their Christmas Glade candles, I bought them all; all 24 of them! They were half of their original price, so it was a steal. Plus it was my favorite scent of cinnamon apple. So burning a candle is not only comforting, it helps make my home smell nice. Years ago I bought a candle holder that has a design on it, so when a candle is lit, the design is flickered onto the wall, which gives the room some ambiance.

To really enjoy my day, I have to have certain food items. Like mints and gum! Yes, these are weird things to desire, but I must have them! I also enjoy my carbs, like the jalapeno chips I get from Whole Foods and Daiya cream cheese and bagels, yum. I know it’s awful for you, but I also must have my diet coke. I don’t enjoy alcohol, so diet coke is my vice. I also enjoy having my TV. Yes, I’m a TV junkie and there are shows I just love to watch. Specifically, almost any show on HLN. I love watching court trials and every night I watch Nancy Grace. I’ve recently also started to watch Jane Velez Mitchell’s show. I love watching the on the case show, which highlights the daily court drama that they’re covering. I also get twitter updates from various news and court feeds, because I love to be kept updated to all the breaking news!

Every day I like to “dress up” in semi cute clothes. In no way do I dress up like I’m going out on a date. But, I like to feel like I look “cute”. I don’t want to be frumpy, even if I’m wearing yoga pants, I can always put on a cute top. I always, always, have my nails painted. This is something I do at least once a week. I love having painted nails and love playing with color. A perfect day is a day I receive one of my makeup subscription boxes! It’s a great feeling getting your makeup box, like a special gift! It’s fun receiving makeup or nail polish straight to your door!

So, give me a cute outfit, polished nails, lit candles, my favorite snack foods and a TV, and we’re all set for my kind of vacation!

Deleting the Negative

Yesterday I noticed I had received two comments on a couple of old posts; since I’ve been a slacker and haven’t blogged recently! One was a very sweet and heartfelt comment from a lovely woman who left a much appreciated comment that I will cherish. Another comment was from a not so nice person. He thought I was being petty about my former neighbor who was accusing me of stealing, even though I caught her stealing clothes from me! I suppose you can’t please everyone online, and people can be really tough and mean when they’re hiding behind a computer screen. It takes a lot of hate and anger to post a rude comment on someone’s blog; but I put myself out there, so negative comments are bound to happen. But, because this is my “happy” place, I promptly deleted his comment. It’s not that I can’t handle his comment, but because I don’t want to have negativity in my life. Anyone that knows my traumatic situation with my former neighbor knows that I was the victim and anyone in my situation would have done what they could to alleviate it. Again, she was evicted for her criminal activity, not me!

But, reading that comment makes me realize how far I’ve come from where I was back when I blogged about my neighbor in July 2013. I won’t lie, that negative comment did upset me, but the longer I thought about it, I realize that anyone can be a hate mongering troll on the internet. You can disagree with someone without being rude! But, I’ve given the troll enough of my attention. My blog is my happy place, if I want to keep it drama and negative free, then I will. Granted, we all have to vent and once I do I feel better. I still think about my former neighbor, both in fear she may return, as well as hoping she is doing better and changed her life. Since my former neighbor moved out, we have a new neighbor who isn’t so quiet. But, I’ve decided to deal with it because I can’t handle any more issues with neighbors, or anyone, for that matter. I tell myself that I need to avoid negative people, per doctors orders.

So, if you’re a troll, I’ll delete you. If you disagree with me, that’s fine, just be cordial about it.

Moving on with the Next Chapter

As you know, if you’ve read my blog or follow me on twitter, I no longer work. I no longer work due to disability, mainly due to disabling arthritis and fibromyalgia. It’s hard because, as you will often hear, “but you look fine”. Yes, I do not typically look like I feel bad at all. In fact, I think most of us with invisible illnesess try very hard to hide and cover up how we really feel. I know, as a woman, I have always felt like I needed to present myself very well made up and strong. You will rarely find me bemoaning how I feel, it’s just not me. I have always stuffed my feelings and try my best to present myself in the best light, even though I’m miserable inside, at times. However, even though I have really awful days, I still try my best to find the silver lining. I am and will always be, a glass half full type of person. I will always remain positive. The truth is, I will have my disability whether I’m negative or positive, so I tend to focus on that which I can do. That’s how I get by, everyone deals with things differently.

I have found that I spend a lot of time focusing on the negativity I’ve experienced by my neighbors. If you’ve read my blog, you will see that life has been really tough since they’ve moved in. I cannot say for certain that they are behind all of the negative things that have occurred, but I do not know anyone else who has such hate towards me. Since I last wrote, we have felt safer moving our car to a more crowded parking spot and purchasing a PO Box. These changes have cost us money, but it’s helping my peace of mind. I realize that my neighbors are sick. They need my prayers more than they need my anger. So I’m really trying my best to keep my faith and mind in love and compassion, even when I’m at my wits end! However, I don’t want to focus all of my time on them. I realize that I write a lot about them. It is helpful in that I can release my feelings through writing. But, I also want to focus on positive things. I can’t say that I won’t ever write about them. but I want to move forward. We decided to renew our lease and in many ways, I’m deciding to renew the way I think about them.

I am a proud, certified, and verified TV Addict! I have always been a TV fan, even as young as 5, I can remember staying up late on the weekends watching music videos. I recall watching the very first episode of the Oprah Winfrey show and sneaking up late at night to watch the crazy antics on the Morton Downy Jr Show, that’s a blast from the past! However, I do tend to spend more time on TV watching than any other activity. So, I’ve made a list of things that I want to start getting done during the day, including catching up on some TV shows. I’ll likely never give up on TV watching, I have no desire to give that up. It’s a hobby and I love it. I am not afraid to admit that. The following are a few things that I want to start including into my daily or weekly routine. I think I do better with lists and writing out what I want to accomplish. I love organization and checking things off a list. Here are the things I’d like to start including in my new routine:

Reading, Blogging/Writing, Cleaning, Organizing, Exercising, Praying/Rosary, Budgeting, Couponing, Menu Planning and TV Watching! Of course this list isn’t comprehensive, I can always add more later. But, if I can attempt to accomplish some or all of these things within my day, as I’m able, I will feel like I’ve added more purpose to my life. It’s easier to sleep at night knowing that I’ve done more than just watch TV. However, I realize there are days where watching TV is about the most I can accomplish, and that’s ok too. The key is to accept what I can do and push myself as much as I’m able to do.

It gets too easy becoming stuck in a rut. I want to have some value and accomplishments within my day. The next chapter is waiting to be lived.

More Neighbor Drama: Peephole Vision

If you’ve been reading my blog, or follow me on twitter, or know me, you know that I have been having “issues” with my new upstairs neighbor. It started off with hearing loud slamming and stomping upstairs at the hours of 2, 3, 4 and 6 AM. I wrote a letter asking for her to keep it down and she responded favorably. I thought it was all worked out, boy was I wrong. It escalated to even more loud noises and being woke up in the middle of the night. My notes were useless because she would eventually write back, to basically get over it, it’s an apartment. Although, yes it’s an apartment, no one should be making such loud noises that I’m jolted awake in the middle of the night. So, I decided to notify our apartment manager, who has a difficult time understanding how such a petite little lady could make so much noise. However, this sweet little lady has two, not so sweet, daughters, that I assume live with her most of the time, at least one of them, of whom I’ve had issues, I’ll get to that. The landlord spoke with the upstairs neighbor and I agreed to make the best of the situation. My upstairs neighbor, the “mom” later ran into my husband and apologized for any noises and told him she had lupus. I decided I would be compassionate and ignore any noises at night. I decided that her daughters were likely helping their mom out and that because I understand what it’s like to live with chronic pain issues, I would be compassionate and patient. I even bought some ear plugs so that I could sleep in peace; even though I could still hear them with ear plugs in!

I had a couple of weeks of peace. Meaning, I felt much better because I accepted the noise and felt comfortable again in my own home. I realize this is an apartment, but for me, it’s my home. I cherish my privacy and comfort and when I feel anxious, I don’t feel safe here. But, I told my apartment manager she had nothing to worry about, that I was going to pray about the situation and be compassionate. Well, that all changed until I ran into one of the daughters. The one with the mugshot. I mentioned before that I found a mugshot of one of the daughters online for petty larceny, which occurred last year. Granted, we all have a past, and I don’t know the full story, I just know she has a mugshot and it did give me alarm. I do realize that everyone can change and you never know what any of your neighbors does in their past. However, knowing this made me a bit concerned because we have items in our storage down in the basement. Granted, ours is locked up, but another resident doesn’t have anything secured.

Regardless, I ran into, I’ll call her “D”. I went down to do my laundry the other day and she came down shortly after. She said hello and I returned the greeting. As I was attending to my laundry, she said she read that I was vegan, which I had included in a previous note to her mom. We discussed how both of us are vegan and for how long. When I asked her why her mom decided to go vegan, she seemed confused. I honestly don’t understand the look on her face, but she kind of looked different when I inquired. Like, perhaps she didn’t like me asking questions? Granted, I don’t know her at all, so it could have been nothing. I just noticed a change in her face when I started to ask questions. The discussion progressed to how she currently lives in an apartment with hardwood floors that has a washer and dryer located in the unit; granted, I was curious why she was always doing laundry here. She could be helping her mom, but surely her mom doesn’t have that much laundry. I mean, she does laundry more often than I do and there are two of us here. I assume that she lives with her mom part of the time, even though she’s not on the lease. I only assume this because I once saw a piece of mail with her name on it and it had a change of address from the post office. Why would her mail be redirected here if she had her own apartment? She then asks me what field I work in. I explained that I am disabled and that I haven’t worked in two years, but had worked as a social worker. She said oh, well you are walking just fine right now. As if that is the only issue that could prevent me from working? Just to let anyone reading this that doesn’t have a disability, it’s very rude to suggest this to anyone, that just because they look fine, doesn’t mean they don’t deal with other issues. I explained that I was having a decent day, that many days are bed days. I said I understood that her mom has lupus, of which she said, oh well, my mother and I are extremely private, we don’t tell everyone everything. I’m not sure where that came from except that I shared in one of my letters that I had fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis. Perhaps, she feels like I’m sharing too much? Perhaps she doesn’t like that I’m on disability? I have no idea what could possibly be going through her head. She then said she was in school for pre-med. I asked what part, as in how far along she was in her studies, to which she gave me that annoyed look, and said I’m pre-med I’m just in the beginning. I didn’t inquire further; however, I kept thinking perhaps she needs to work on her bedside manner and not assume that someone who can walk doesn’t have a disability.

I left out one key point, prior to my going down to the basement to do my laundry, I noticed a note on her mom’s mailbox. It said that there were pieces of mail in the shared plastic bin, where the mailman puts larger mail items such as magazines. The note stated that she noticed she had several pieces of mail there but at the time she was unable to grab them. She stated that when she returned, the mail was then gone. When I walked upstairs to return to my apartment, D was right behind me. I mentioned that I had read her moms note about the mail. I asked if perhaps she spoke with the neighbor upstairs, to which she said oh yes of course and she said she would never take our mail. Then I asked if she spoke with the mailman, perhaps he took it the next day because it wasn’t picked up. She claimed she was there when the mailman delivered the mail the next day and that he said he didn’t take it. I asked if she spoke with our apartment manager who will clean out the bins if mail is sitting in there for awhile. She again claimed of course not, as this was only two days. I was struck by the suggestion that she thinks that I took her mail. She did not come out and say this, but she glared at me and I am pretty certain she thinks I have her mail. Which I would never take anyone’s mail! That is ludicrous!

Later on when I went down to put my clothes into the dryer, I unlocked the basement door, which locks anytime it’s closed shut. I was surprised as D was sitting on her mom’s dryer reading a magazine. I didn’t realize anyone was down there because the basement door was shut. I didn’t say much to her and we engaged in short conversation. She mentioned how we will be getting a young couple moving in across the hall, which she stated that she hoped they liked to party and have fun. To which, I was thinking, please I hope they don’t! I don’t need any more drama! I came back upstairs and later my husband brought in the mail. I was standing by my front door reading the mail when I heard the basement door slam shut. I peeked out the peephole and D was walking by and she glared at my door and flipped it off! She gave me the middle finger! I was shocked. I have no idea what could have prompted this reaction, as she did not seem angry, except those couple of times she seemed to not like my asking questions. I then wondered if perhaps she could see me peeking through the peephole. I had my husband look and I looked, and you cannot see anyone who is looking through. My husband was pissed and up until this point, it has always been me writing the letters and dealing with everything. He wrote a letter to the upstairs neighbor telling her that we did not take her mail and that if someone has done that, then we also need to be aware as then we have a thief that needs to be reported. He ended the note saying, “and what’s up with flipping us off?”. About fifteen minutes later, I heard D come down the stairs and put something outside our door. It was my husbands note crumpled up into a ball. She didn’t write anything on it, just crumpled it up. He left a voicemail with our apartment manager that this situation needs to be resolved or we’re going to have to move. I could later hear that the mom came home, yes, they are so loud I can tell when one returns home! When the mom left to take the dog out for a walk, which I can hear because my door is right by the stairs that they have to walk by to get to the outside, D started stomping and slamming things at full force; it was obviously on purpose. When her mom returned, she stopped.

Incidentally, yesterday at about 10pm, it’s always late when they start making noise. The mom and daughter returned home. Again, I heard loud slamming noises and finally I heard the basement door slam shut. I peeked out the peephole and D walked by hunched down as far as she could so to try and not be seen. What she doesn’t realize is that the peephole shows a full aerial so she could be crawling and I could still see her. How insane is that???? I admit, my health issues have been affected by all of this. Thankfully I have Xanax for when my anxiety gets bad and I’ve had to take it daily for the past three weeks. I don’t know how much longer I can live like this. My husband tells me to not look out the peephole any more. I don’t feel safe going into the basement or even to get my mail. I don’t want to run into D and I feel that she could retaliate for what she thinks I’ve done. The apartment manager is on vacation until tomorrow, so I hope she will call so I can update her on this situation. I honestly don’t know what she can do. My hands shake just thinking about this situation. I’ve been looking online for other apartments, which really sucks because my husband and I both love our apartment. We have lived here for just shy of 4 years; our lease is up next month. We will have to make a decision soon as to what we’re going to do. Most of my twitter friends feel it’s time for me to move. That this is not good for my health and that D will not get better. I am her target and she is not capable of acting like an adult.

I just hate having to leave my home, but I also hate feeling like a prisoner in my own home. We have a couple more weeks until we have to decide whether we’re going to renew our lease or not. I don’t know if I can handle another year like this. I miss the old boring way things used to be!

Add your Pinterest RSS to your blog!

HOW TO ADD PINTEREST RSS TO YOUR BLOG!
Posted on August 24, 2012 by SARAH LONDON 22 Comments
This morning I added a feed of my most recent pins to the sidebar on my blog!

Here’s a quick tutorial in case you’d like to also.

This is the quick and easy way to install, for a free WordPress blog!

1. Locate your Pinterest rss.

2. Enter the text feed.rss as shown below.

3. Log in to your WordPress dashboard.

4. Click Appearance –> Widgets.

5. Click on the FLICKR widget.

6. Ensure to fill out the ‘Title: space’. I simply entered a row of dots.

If you leave it blank it will automatically go to default ‘Flickr Photos’.

7. Copy and paste your Pinterest RSS url into the space provided as shown above.

8. Select how many ‘pins’ you would like to display.

9. Select the position of the widget re: sidebar.

10. SAVE widget.

Hey presto! Your most recent pins will now be displayed in the sidebar of your blog!

Hopefully in the not to distant future WordPress will offer a Pinterest widget, in the meantime enter via the backdoor and utilize the Flickr widget.

Happy Pinning!

Purchased a new rug at the #Antique Mall

I’ve been posting a lot about my upstairs neighbor lately, so I’m going to stop doing that. It doesn’t bring me happiness, so it’s not worth focusing on. She hasn’t stopped being noisy and having late night cleaning activity, but I did learn she has lupus. After learning that, I have more compassion and I’m doing my best to be patient and accepting. I have good and bad days, but overall, it’s helping me to be happier in my home, which is priceless!

My husband I got out of the apartment last week and we went to our local antique mall. It’s a large mall with about 100 booths. We walked every aisle and almost the last booth, I found something I wanted! I am not the kind of person to purchase a rug from an antique mall, because, well, you just don’t know it’s back story. But, I just loved the rug and the price, $22, was just too great to pass up! We opened it up in the hall of the mall and could not see any stains or issues with the rug. I am so glad I went ahead and purchased it! It’s a much better color combo for my living room and is bigger than the one I had. I love it!

I love the neutral design and the red matches a red, chrome chair I have in my living room, so it pulls it together. My cats love it, it’s thicker than the previous rug, which we now put in my husband’s office. So it’s a win-win for both of us.

I love finding a great deal at the antique mall!

Dealing with An Unreasonable Neighbor #apartment #renting

Well, last time I blogged, I was reaping the rewards of working out an issue with my upstairs neighbor. I had written her a letter asking that she keep down the noise level at 6AM; specifically, slamming her closet door in the bedroom. She responded by being extremely apologetic and even gave me a plant. I really thought that we were going to work out wonderfully. A few days later, I was woke up at 2AM then 3 AM the following night, by numerous sounds, all inappropriate banging and slamming noises. I can’t imagine what could be happening upstairs, but I did later learn that my neighbor says she fell at 2am, which explains why I was jolted awake. She apparently has severe mobility issues and will often times, fall, very loudly. I wondered why a woman would choose to live on the second floor of an apartment with hardwood floors, alone. But, I fully believe that her daughter spends most of her time here, possibly 5 out of 7 days a week. It’s very rare that I don’t see her daughter. I fully understand that she should likely be living with someone, but her daughter isn’t on the lease, and seems to be the one who is especially noisy.

I spoke with my landlord who informed me that my upstairs neighbor wrote her a note and left her my notes; I had left another note after the 2 and 3 AM wake up calls. Which I did receive a response stating that she couldn’t possibly be any louder than the maintenance work going on, which happens to be during the day. She also said she heard my husband and I speaking very loudly and just realizes this is apartment living. So basically, she’s telling me to deal with it and get over myself. Our landlord was a bit confused as to how to proceed as she views both of us as “nice” ladies. I have rented here for over 3 years, the new tenant for less than a month. Some of the comments that my upstairs neighbor left in her note to my manager is that she felt my husband and I were fighting and using very abusive language. Granted, I do argue with my husband and I can’t specifically remember all that is said, but it’s never at an unGodly hour, like 2, 3 or 6 am. I believe the fight we had was at 3:30PM, as we have been quite stressed over his losing his job. Do I think arguing is appropriate? No, but husbands and wives talk to each other perhaps differently than what you may think you would. We’ve been together for 14 years and married for 10, there is nothing abusive about our relationship. Furthermore, I can hear her and her daughter talking all hours of the day and night, yet I’ve never complained about talking. It’s always about the loud banging and slamming noises I hear at 2, 3 and 6 AM.

My landlord spoke with my upstairs neighbor about her letter and then spoke to me the next day. I informed my landlord that I didn’t think she had spoken to my neighbor as it was as noisy as any other day and I didn’t notice any difference. She said she was very clear about noise levels and appropriate times of day, etc. I told her that I too tried to explain that I realize this is not a library and that we will hear each other, but that it was common courtesy to not be so noisy when people are trying to sleep. We decided that it’s quite possible the noise I’m hearing is the daughter cleaning after her mom goes to bed. Some of the noises sound like chairs or tables being scooted around, making a very loud squeaking sound. I hear noises of cords being dropped and the sound of a mop being banged about the apartment. One may wonder how I can possibly hear all of this? It’s loud! It’s especially loud at 2, 3 and 6 AM.

Here I write to you on a Sunday morning before 9AM with lots and lots of banging sounds above me. This morning I was woke up at 6 by, I assume,  cleaning noises. Then I was blessed with hammer noises; I have no idea what in the world that could be for. And the ever present thump, thump, thumping of their stomping feet. I’m tired and worn out. I haven’t spoken to my landlord for a few days;  I’m sure she thinks that everything is just fine as she hasn’t heard from me. I don’t know if I should just call and say, no, nothing has changed or just leave it alone and live this way. Our lease is up after our August rent and we have to give a 30 day notice. I made it clear to my landlord that we were very much leaning towards moving out. Oh, and one comment our landlord said that really bothers us is, she said she talked to the owner who said he didn’t want the new tenant to feel ganged up on, nor did he want to lose a new tenant. Seriously? What about the ones that have been here for 3 years that have never been late on our rent or ever had any complaints made about us?

I think it’s time we leave our apartment. We love it, but it’s become miserable. I realize, and fear, that wherever we move could be much, much worse. I’ve lived in 14 apartments since I moved out of my parents’ home. So, I know what a good and bad neighbor is. I know that I’ll likely never live on the ground floor of an apartment building that has hardwood floors. I know if I live on the top unit of an apartment with hardwood floors, I will put down rugs and never wear shoes inside. Of course, I’ll never wake anyone up with any kind of noise at 2, 3 or 6AM. I would even consider asking the downstairs neighbor if the noise level is bad. I will research online reviews of apartment buildings to see if there are complaints about noise levels. I don’t want to keep moving and I do want to be settled. I had hoped that my current home would be my “forever” home, but I don’t think I can live like it is. It’s difficult to work with a neighbor who doesn’t see that there is anything wrong with cleaning at an early hour. You just can’t reason with someone like that.

Thankfully, we have another month to figure out what our long term plans will be. To Be Continued…

A Letter to My Neighbor

If you’ve been reading my blog, you will know that I’ve had some “issues” with a new upstairs neighbor. Specifically, being woke up at 4 in the morning by slamming doors and loud walking. Two days in a row without getting good sleep, makes for a very crabby lady here. Not only was I crabby and tired, I was starting to fear for my long term plans. I wasn’t sure if I was going to renew my lease or start looking elsewhere. I even called another apartment complex to inquire. I’m always online looking for apartments, just to see what else is out there, but now I was doing so with more vengeance, because I was seriously thinking I needed to move out. I went online to both twitter and google to search for what to do! I did receive a negative comment in regards to my question whether you would be nervous to find out if your neighbor had a mugshot? It was a simple question. In no way, shape or form, would I deny that anyone could find themselves in their lifetime with a mugshot. I understand that having a mugshot does not equate you are a rotten and horrible person. (I did learn that it’s not my neighbor with the mugshot, but it’s most likely her daughter. Just a side note.) But, if you judge me based on one sentence, then you are guilty of what you’re blaming me for! Again, just because someone has a mugshot, does not make them guilty or horrible. There is always more to a story, just like there was more to my question. Just ask, I would be glad to elaborate. Sorry, went off a little there, just frustrating when people, who you think are your friends, judge you based on a 140 character limit! That aside, most people would be a little nervous to know that their neighbor has a mugshot for theft. It’s natural and human to be nervous. Period.

Because I was a bit timid about this and I have anxiety issues, I was starting to spiral about everything. I was depressed and anxious about what my future held. This may sound crazy to some, but for those of us who are disabled, our home is our everything. So, the idea of having to move or feel threatened in your own home, is very scary. It’s very hard coming to grips on what to do, you almost feel stuck. I know I don’t have a lot of money and it’s hard to just pack up and move when you spend a lot of your time in bed. It’s also hard to move when you love your home. Prior to all of this neighbor drama, I loved where I live. Granted, there are a few things that bother me, one of which is that my washer and dryer is down in the shared basement, but that’s something  I’ve learned to live with for three years now. When I went to google “How to Deal with a Noisy Neighbor” I found from the funny to silly in responses. No, putting a lit bag of doggy poo at my neighbors door isn’t my style. Other responses suggested that I bang on my ceiling, but I think that can be risky because two can play that game! When you start banging back they may take great offense and then target you for any and all noise. There were level headed responses like, well, tell the neighbor how you’re feeling. Since I’ve never met my neighbor, face to face, I was really nervous about this too. So, I did what I do best, I wrote her a letter.

The letter was very nice and I started it by welcoming her to the neighborhood. I told her I hope she enjoyed living in her new home as much as I have during my past three years. I then spoke humbly about how, although the homes are redecorated beautifully, insulation was an afterthought. I discussed how since they removed the carpet, the new hardwood floors just amplified all noise, unfortunately. I wrote that the same was true with doors, that anytime they close a little heavy, it sounds like they’re being slammed below because of the poor insulation. I did report my concern about being woke up at 4 and then 5:30 AM two days in a row by slamming closet doors. I then discussed how I live with chronic pain issues and not getting proper sleep makes for a miserable day the next day. I stated that I am almost certain she has no idea how loud certain things are below, because most apartments provide more sound proofing than ours do. I also discussed how I hear her little dog howling when she leaves, but that it never bothers me and that I would never complain about that. I wanted her to feel comfortable knowing that I wasn’t bothered by his little sobs, although I just want to give him a hug. I wrote that I sincerely apologize for any TV noises. We have three TV’s in my home, yes it’s a small apartment, but we have a TV in our living room, office and bedroom. I stated that I would never turn my bedroom TV on after 10pm out of respect for her sleep. I did state that should I learn she worked nights, I would have no problem in switching this and not turning the bedroom TV on during the day. I then asked about cigarette smoking; I now know that the person I saw smoking was her daughter. I asked if she wouldn’t mind not lighting her cigarette outside my window because I’m allergic; they give me migraines. I stated that unfortunately our windows aren’t sealed very great either. I followed it by saying ” I hope I don’t sound like an old lady. I’m 38. I just hope that we can make a few adjustments. I am open to any that you have as well. I want to “co-habitate” as friendly neighbors. Again, welcome!”. Signed by me.

I taped the letter to her mailbox and waited. About an hour later, my husband brought in a note from her. She started it by thoroughly apologizing for any inconvenience she caused me and stated that her closet doors became off track, which has happened to me many times. So that’s why it was banging. She stated that she completely understood about my need for good sleep as she too has a chronic illness, she didn’t say what. She also admitted that cigarette smoke gives her a migraine, she says her daughters visit and they smoke out back on the balcony, but that she asks them to keep it far away from her. She reported that she would be buying more rugs to help with the sound proofing and was hopeful that, that would be the key. She stated that my TV’s do not bother her one bit and to play them anytime I want; I still won’t turn my TV on in bed after 10, I would feel awful if I was possibly keeping someone awake. Overall, she was extremely polite and thankful to me for my letter. Stating that she firmly believes in communication and believes that we could resolve any issues by being open together. She also indicated that she is a nurse and that should I need anything to ask. I felt like a huge HUG after I read her letter. With the extremely stressful week that I had, this letter was perfect. I knew that she could take my letter one of two ways, thankfully, she appreciated what I wrote. Also, this morning, I woke up to this:

So, I am so relieved! The moral of the story, go with your heart. If you are kind, you likely get kindness in return. Not always, but at least you were doing the right thing. I think now she and I will be great neighbors. Now, if I hear a loud noise, I can smile, knowing that she is probably doing her best to keep the volume level down. Sometimes, we think the worst until we get to know the person. That’s the negative of most human nature. I’m glad I took the time to write to her and she seems to appreciate the open communication. Now, on to work on world peace 😉

Upstairs Neighbor Drama

I’m very cranky today. It’s probably more appropriate for this Cancer sign to say I’m crabby today, both fit. Why? Well, I am going on a bit of lack of sleep. Not the typical kind where my body doesn’t allow sleep because of chronic pain and fatigue. This lack of sleep is due to a rude upstairs neighbor. My new neighbor moved in roughly last weekend, and has made her presence known quick. I can’t be 100%, but I believe she may be in trouble with the law, at least she was last year. I googled her last name, which is a very unique, not common name, and found a very interesting mugshot. It did look a lot like my neighbor, granted, from what I could see from my peephole. Her mugshot was from last year and was for petty larceny. Granted, I don’t know the full story or situation, I just know that a woman with my neighbors name, has a mugshot for petty larceny and she was, according to the website, at age 30. My husband got a good look at her as she was walking the dog and when I showed him the mugshot, he said, wow, that looks a lot like her. So, again, I’m not sure, but I think it’s most likely her. Granted, anyone can have a back story and I’m not judging, because, all of us have found ourselves in trouble of some kind in our lives. Some of us get caught, while others don’t. However, I certainly wasn’t doing any of that activity when I was 30. I was a career woman, with a steady job and income. But, I don’t know the full story.

I say all of this because it gives you some idea of what my mind has been going through. Not only am I bit concerned with leaving things out, like the washing detergent I leave sitting on my washer and dryer, which is downstairs in our shared basement. Should I now start putting that away? Which would be a great pain, let me add. I suppose I’ll play it by ear. Should I notice that I’m going through it quickly, then maybe I’ll put it away. I recall when I first moved in to this apartment and told my former coworkers about the shared basement where our washer and dryer are placed. My one very negative coworker mentioned, well how will you know if they’re using yours or not? I just shrugged her off, now I’m wondering! Prior to this new neighbor moving in, there was an elderly lady living upstairs who, was a saint, compared to this new one. Granted, she had annoying, did I say annoying, grand kids, that would come over roughly every other weekend. They liked to push the buzzers, not doorbells, but buzzers, which are quite alarming and startling. They’re more like that Operation game buzzer going off, but much louder. Their father, who I assumed was the son of the elderly neighbor, was often over, and I think was living with his mom towards the end of her living here. He was a smoker, I hate, I mean HATE, cigarettes, so I was always annoyed going into my hallway to smell the smoke after he walked by just a mere hour before. However, he was always polite, his children, not so much.

This new neighbor has a dog. I love animals, of course I love cats much, much more. The other day she left and her dog was sobbing and howling after she left. I honestly just felt so sad for the little baby. I wanted to hold him and tell him his mommy would be back soon. I honestly did not mind hearing him cry. Honestly, I’d much prefer an animal as a neighbor, well, as opposed to the human kind. I’d put up with her dog howling all night long, over the banging doors, at 4 AM, that I woke to this morning. Our bedrooms are in the same position, so at 4 this morning I heard her opening and closing, opening and closing her closet doors, slamming them shut. Perhaps it wasn’t slamming, but if I can hear her doors closing, it’s loud! If any door shutting wakes me up, it’s too loud! Granted, my husband and I are TV junkies. She probably hears our TV’s going. I realize there are noises that all tenants have to deal with. I get it, I’ve been a renter since I was 19. I have lived in many, many apartments, She ranks about the top 3 worst neighbors. I say this so far because every day she has lived here, I’ve heard her stomping across her newly uncovered hard wood floors, which I know create much more noise. She’s a heel walker folks. A loud ass heel walker. I suppose ballet wasn’t in the cards for her as a child, maybe that’s why she has a mugshot? She supposedly lives alone, but I hear her talking very loudly to someone, whether it’s in person or on the phone, I don’t know.

The other night I kept hearing a slamming door in my hallway. Come to find out she was bringing chairs from her upstairs apartment and putting them in the basement to store in her storage. I have opened and closed that basement door many times, there is a way to close it gently. It takes a bit of finesse. I realize that some people don’t slowly roll their cars to a stop and gently brake, to a perfect unison of smoothness. I pride myself that I can brake without any slight movements. I realize I may be a bit too much of a perfectionist. When I’m watching TV, I turn it down to about a 13 volume level, unless there is music, then I turn it down closer to a 10. My hand is always on the remote just in case the actors get carried away. I don’t feel like I’m given the same respect. I know it’s apartment living and you can’t expect the same with each renter. There are definitely some that treat their apartment like a home vs. just a place to live. My apartment is my home. I love peace and quiet and to feel safe. I hate hearing someone stomping above me, talking very loudly, slamming closet doors at 4 am, and slamming basement doors in the evening. I am a bit nervous about her record. Granted, I know I could be living next to people with much worse records, but now that I am pretty sure she has one, it does give me concern. I would never be rude to her because of it, I just will keep my guard up until I know her, if I ever do.

So, like I wrote, I’m very crabby today. I don’t like being woke up by loud noises. If you rent, be courteous of your neighbors. I should probably be living on the top floor. I don’t wear shoes in my apartment, I don’t have kids, my cats don’t make any loud thumping noises, and overall, the only noise you might hear out of me is a TV or me yelling at my husband! However, even though I have a TV in my bedroom, I now only watch during the day. I would never watch my TV at night knowing I have a neighbor upstairs possibly trying to sleep. Now that there are hardwood floors, I realize how much insulation the carpets provided. I miss those carpets! I wish the landlord put in more insulation so that you can’t hear as much. I did get nervous about the noise because I could hear my former neighbors when they were peeing in their bathrooms! These apartments need better insulation! However, if my neighbor would take off her shoes, walk a little softer or wear socks/slippers, and stop slamming doors, we may be able to cohabitate. Otherwise, I’m seriously looking at moving.